ALON®*$ALON ↗
UNOFFICIAL. UNREASONABLY LONG.

ALON
COHEN↗

LONG CHIN.
SHORT VIDEOS.

The pump.fun co-founder got a parody.
Now he's in your feed holding cash.
That's the whole fucking pitch.

WATCH THE VIDEOS ↘$ALON · CA BELOW
* NOT THE REAL ALON. NO ENDORSEMENT.
Long-chin Alon parody taking a mirror selfie in a Stop Being Poor tank top
CHIN
GOES
CRAZY.
FIG. 01 / THE MAN. THE CHIN.👍
01 / DUE DILIGENCE

HE'S BUSY.
DOING THIS.

Cash. Cars. Questionable dancing.
Watch it before you ask for a thesis.

AI-generated long-chin Alon parody holding cash in an apartmentAI PARODY / NOT A REAL PHOTO
02 / THE JOKE

HE BUILT
THE CASINO.
WE MADE
HIM DANCE.

October 10. The real pump.fun co-founder posts a cartoon of himself with a chin you could park a car on.

October 11. We give it legs, a TikTok account, and an irresponsible amount of cash. He posted the character. We made the bastard dance.

He built pump.fun.
We put his chin to work.

AI influencer experiment. Not his coin. Not his endorsement. Just the joke escaping his replies.

REAL ALON'S ORIGINAL POST ↗

OUR RESPONSE: RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW ↗

THE PARODY ON X ↗
AI parody of long-chin Alon in a suit outside a glass office tower at sunset
COMPLETELY MADE UP.

THE CHIN
HAS ARRIVED.

AI PARODY. NO ACTUAL OFFICE WAS HARMED.
03 / THE INFLUENCER META

MAKE THE NAME
IMPOSSIBLE TO MISS.

Not a product roadmap.
A plan to annoy the internet.

  1. MORE ACCOUNTS.

    Same chin. More feeds. TikTok, X, everywhere people scroll instead of sleeping.

  2. MORE POSTING.

    Cash in the morning. Dancing at lunch. Something stupid after the close.

  3. MORE VIDEOS.

    The suit stays. The chin stays. The situation gets worse.

  4. THEN ADS.

    Put him in front of people who have never opened a chart.

  5. THEN $ALON.

    They know the face before they know the ticker. That's the idea, not a promise.

04 / CHECK THE EXACT CA

IT'S $ALON.
NOT HIS COIN.

VIEW THE CHART ↗CHECK THE MINT ↗

Unofficial parody. Not affiliated with or endorsed by Alon Cohen or pump.fun. Images and videos depict a fictional parody, not real events. $ALON is a meme token and can go to zero. Not financial advice. Verify the exact contract, not just the name.